I Was a Feminist and Didn't Know It: My New Quest

I am on a new quest these days to learn all I can about biblical womanhood, women's ministry, and what my role is. I have desired to serve in women's ministry for about three years. The heart behind that desire has changed though in the recent months. I started with the desire to the serve the church, then that desire narrowed to teaching Sunday School, and then it further narrowed to teaching women, simply because that is what SBC said was appropriate. I understood the actual teaching and discipleship as being fundamentally the same as teaching and discipling men.

Now my heart wants to minister to women not because of obligation but because I want to see young women grow into faithful women of God who defy the culture's skewed view of women and who stand strong against gender confusions. I realize now that a difference between men's discipleship and women's discipleship does exist by virtue of the fact that men and women are different.

God has humbled me. He has used different ways to do it. He has shown me that I know nothing and need to get busy learning from seasoned, godly women and preparing for who He wants me to be and what He wants me to do. I listened to a podcast message tonight from True Woman. In it, Mary Kassian gave a overview of the material she covers in her book about feminism. While she shared a brief history of feminism, I realized that I am a feminist who professed complementarianism. (What?!) Yes, it is true. As Nancy Leigh DeMoss points out at the end of the message, feminism has even permeated the Church in North America. I see that. I used to work from the feminist framework that women's ministry was just a ministry on the side--a place to put women who were gifted in teaching and leading in spiritual formation but would go against the rule of teaching men if they were not put in their own corner. I bought into the belief that women were second-class and men called the shots, even in church. Such a tainted framework mixed with pride produced my ignorant stance that I did not need gender-specific instruction for ministry and that I might even be better-off for learning under men and experiencing dominant male influence throughout my life.

But God tore down the framework and spoiled my pride. He brought me low. Now He is building me back up for a right form. I am realizing that women's ministry is beautiful and necessary. Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Mary Kassian, Elyse Fitzpatrick, Joni Erickson Tada, and many other wonderful women are on a mission. And I think I want to join them.